Warning: Senioritis (It Could Happen to You)

Warning: Senioritis (It Could Happen to You)

You may have heard of Senioritis before.  Underclassmen joke about having it; teachers dread it’s inevitable outbreak, and every senior you know is susceptible to this life-altering illness. Senioritis is a chronic and progressive disease, meaning it lasts for months and gets worse over time. Flare-ups are common around return from breaks, Mondays, large projects, important tests, and tasks that require any effort whatsoever.

Causes: Three years of high school. Caution: If senioritis does not automatically set in when you first step onto campus in August, first signs will definitely begin to appear after students are accepted into college.

Signs and Symtoms:  – Consistent tardiness, Glazed, half-awake look in patient’s eyes, Dropping grades, Chronic fatigue, Extreme migraines when faced with tests, poor concentration, regularly absent from school, lack of caring.

Prevention:  – It’s hopeless. Senioritis is coming, and it’s coming for you.

Treatment: – Increased caffeine intake can aid slightly with day-to-day symptoms.

Transmission: – This disease is highly contagious. Beware of large groups of seniors.  Senioritis progresses faster when around other infected students.

Cure: Graduation.